Random Wednesday

I am calling today “Random Wednesday” because from it’s start at 12:00 AM to today there have been nothing but random oddness going on. It is the afternoon as I type this and I am hoping this weirdness won’t continue into the night.

1. So I am up late with insomnia. I am in the middle of writing a letter to a friend (yes, actually physically writing a letter and not an email) when my phone rings. The caller id says “Private Number”. I’m worried that it may be a my Mom with bad news, or who knows. So I answer and it is this guy calling from Monteseri Hospital saying he is calling to let me know that Michael has been shot.

Whoah. . . give me a little warning first. Tell me that you have bad news and that I should sit down.

And second, and more importantly, who the fuck is Michael?! I don’t know any Michaels other than my cousin in New Jersey and my other cousin in Florida. So I ask for this Michael’s last name. The guy says “Michael Jackson.” I had to stifle a laugh. I kept my composure because this guy sounded so serious and I could hear hospital noises in the background. Apparently, my number was one of the last numbers Michael called from his cell-phone. Odd, because my phone has been relatively silent the last few days.

So I apologize to the guy that I don’t know Michael Jackson. And I feel bad. People get shot every day here in NYC, but here is someone who doesn’t have anybody know that he’s been shot and they call me. Great, as if I needed another thing to keep me up!

2. I am here at work and my co-worker comes in. She says, “You wouldn’t believe the exchange that I just had with this lady while parking my car!”

I know I am walking straight into the Random-Zone so I reply, “What happened?”

“So I am parking my car and this woman yells out the window, “Miss! You can’t park there!” I say back, “Why not?!” And the lady says, get this, “I got to sweep the rain out of the street!”

Ok, folks. Let’s review what this woman said, “I got to sweep the rain out of the street!” Isn’t that physically impossible, especially since it’s still raining!?! And where are you going to sweep it to? Back onto the sidewalk? It’s in the street and it will eventually go down the sewers. That is how it works in the city.

3. Then my friend instant messages me with a joke regarding this new flash game to which I’ve become addicted. I am ashamed to say how much I have enjoy this game. It is so WRONG!! It’s called Kitty Cannon. Yeah, I know. I’m going to hell for liking this so much. My record distance is 2,006 yards. (For the record, I do not, in any way, endorse or condone real violence towards real animals. That is just despicable.)


4. In the afternoon I call people to come into interview for positions in my department. I have already written about the hiring process and the mental giants we get applying in an old post. So you can imagine the caliber of people I’m calling. I call one person and she has music playing on her outgoing message for a whole 2 minutes and then the beep. No name as to whose I am calling. No "Please leave a message" or some other statement as to what she'd like me to do when the beep happens. Yeah, that’s really good when people are calling you for a job.

Furthermore, it was crappy music and sounded horrible! You give some one a answering machine and all of sudden they’re a DJ. Also, don’t people realize that this things compress the sound to be able to fit in the memory so you lose a lot of audio quality. If I was calling her from my cell-phone I’d be pissed and would have told her off for wasting my minutes with her crappy music selection.

5. So I take a break to go to the bank. And there is a traffic jam on the block. Two trucks double park on either side on the street. And people are back up in both directions trying to go through the middle of two truck which only has space for one car. The horns start honking. And it was like that for at least 20-30 minutes.

Do you think the truck drivers thought for one minute that they were going to cause huge problems? Of course not, their brains aren’t that big. These guys looked like they're the first generation to walk erect! Common sense people, is that too much to ask?

6. I read an article that Voyager 1 left the solar system this week after being launched 26 years ago. Great! Let’s tell the aliens where we are! You know they’ll just love to come here to shop at Wal-Mart and watch Reality TV! Or maybe they’ll get addicted to the next Paris Hilton story and download her video on the internet.


7. As as it turns out the day has ended somewhat normal. (It's 8:40pm EST as I type #7.) I had dinner with friend and it is just another rainy night. I'm tired and I think I'll actually go to be at a decent hour tonight. Granted it won't mean much when the Hellions wake me up at 6:30AM, but a peaceful sleep until then will be good. Hopefully, no more randomness for Thursday.