A Room, A Room, My Kingdom for a Room. . . .
The apartment hunt has started in full earnest. Nothing like going through hundreds of ads of people seeking roommates. Can you sense my excitement? It's is slowly building to epic proportions.
Here's is the crux of the search. I need to find a place, within my price range, that will be convienent to commute to Astoria, where my job is currently located, and then Hollis, where my office will be moving to in September. Also, I am looking for a somewhat decent neighborhood. I am not particularly interested in a loft, no matter how nice it may be, in a former industrial areas that looks at night like the setting of a post apocalyptic urban horror movie . . .complete with C.H.U.D.S. (Please say that someone gets that reference!)
Also, there can't be any damn, bloody hellions upstairs!!!
So starts the process of answering ads and hoping something works out. It's obviously going to be a numbers game like everything else is, particularly dating. I once had a friend who basically asked to have sex with just about every woman he met. Sure he got slapped a lot. But you know, his .100-.200 batting average was better than the no nookie I was getting at the time. Anyway, you get the idea.
Back to the classifieds. . . .
posted by Spider @ 9:16 PM
2 comments
2 Comments:
I've always preffered R.o.U.S.'s over C.H.U.D.'s myself. As far as acronymical(is that a word?) creatures go there's few better.
Though I'm pretty sure I've seen both of them along the N/R in Union Square...
R.o.U.S reminds me of my favorite "Little Johnny" joke.
So the teacher tells the class that she is going to go through the alphabet and they have to think of a word that starts with each letter. "Let's start with A. Can anybody think of a word that starts with A?"
Little Johnny is anxiously raising his hand, practically jumping out of his seat. But the teacher doesn't call on him because she knows that Little Johnny will just say a cuss word. And with A, he'll say asshole. So teacher chooses Suzy.
"Apple starts with A."
"Good job, Suzy. Ok, class can anyone think of a word that starts with the letter B?"
Little Johnny raises his hand again. But the teacher knows he'll say "bitch" and chooses Tommy instead.
"Bread starts with B."
"Very Good, Tommy."
And so it continues down the alphabet. Little Johnny raises his hand for each letter and the teacher knowing he'll say a cuss work for each letter. C-cunt, D-dick, and so on.
Eventually, the teacher gets to the letter R. Little Johnny is still fervently raising his hand. The teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there isn't a cuss word that starts with the letter R. I guess it's safe to call on Johnny."
"Ok, Johnny. Can you tell us a word that starts with the letter R?"
"Yes, I can! Rats! Big MOTHERF*$*IN' RATS WITH TAILS THIS F*&@IN' LONG!"
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