A Minor Observation

I went to a local open mic night last night with a friend to relax and hear some local music. As usual, some really great music....and some really bad music. But it's all in good fun.

But that's not the point. The point is that my friend buys me a beer, and knowing that I should have said Guinness I instead said, "I'll have what your having."

He gives me a Heinken bottle.

Never one to turn down free beer I say thank you, do the ritual "First One Today!" toast, and glady drink my beer. (There's a whole story to that toast which will be fodder for a future post when their site comes back online.) Which in turn leads me to the following conclusion.

Heineken beer tastes like ass!!!

Now, I have to vehemently exclaim that I have NO experience whatsoever with tasting ass (I'm sure my mom really needed to know that) to be able to make a comparison. HOWEVER, I am sure that if I ever tasted ass (which ain't gonna happen!) I would say, "Holy Shit! (Pun very much intended) This tastes like Heineken beer!"

I mean they (Heineken brewers) don't even hide the fact that their beer tastes like ass in it's name. "Heine(y) + ken (kin)" I am sure that wordologists would sure be able to tell that that name means a "heiney's kin" or "a kin to a heiney"

Of course, all this ass-tasting beer is bringing back memories of my high school graduation night where my best friend Steve and I each drank at least 36 ounces of this green bottled libation. Since he had a higher tolerance, he was able to go out on the boardwalk and beach with our friends while I stayed in the car with the spins. You would have thought that I would have learned the lesson to stay away from Heineken then, but really do we ever learn anything at 17.

Should have asked for the Guinness. But then you would never have learned this valuable lesson from my pain.