I Could Have Told You That!!

Today's post comes from the batch of stories titled, "Did they really need to spend money on that?!!" Usually, I make a comment like that after watching a ridiculous preview for some stupid movie (like Bratz, The Adventures of Pluto Nash, Hot Rod, Bride of Chucky, Seed of Chucky, and the list goes on). Often I comment out loud for the entire theater to hear, "Great! With the millions spent on that movie we could have had a cure for cancer by now!!!" much to the embarrassment of my friends.

Anyway, this post isn't about Hollywood current vacuum of good, original ideas. (cough, cough, Rush Hour 3, cough, cough) . It concerns this article Here:

Why People Have Sex: It Feels Good

By SETH BORENSTEIN, AP Science Writer

WASHINGTON - After exhaustively compiling a list of the 237 reasons why people have sex, researchers found that young men and women get intimate for mostly the same motivations. It's more about lust in the body than a love connection in the heart.

College-aged men and women agree on their top reasons for having sex — they were attracted to the person, they wanted to experience physical pleasure and "it feels good," according to a peer-reviewed study in the August edition of Archives of Sexual Behavior. Twenty of the top 25 reasons given for having sex were the same for men and women.

Expressing love and showing affection were in the top 10 for both men and women, but they did take a back seat to the clear No. 1: "I was attracted to the person."

Researchers at the University of Texas spent five years and their own money to study the overlooked why behind sex while others were spending their time on the how.

The article continues. You can read the rest by clicking on the link.

Ok. They spent FIVE YEARS on this study. And they used THEIR OWN MONEY to fund it. I could have told you in FIVE MINUTES and it would only cost them 25 CENTS for the phone call.

Why do people have sex?! What's the #1 reason?! "It feels good. I was attracted to the person." WELL, DUH!!!!!!

There isn't an "overlooked why" when people have sex!! Everyone of us has asked ourselves, "Why am I having sex with this person?" Even if our answer is as basal as, "I was drunk." or "We were drunk." or "Hey, it was a mercy-f*@$." it still FEELS GOOD. DUH!!!

And then if we goto the other end of the spectrum, and we explore the love aspect and all the similar whys like "I was seeking a spiritual connection with my partner." or "His/her pleasure is essential to my own." or "I love my soulmate and desired communion." Guess what? IT STILL FEELS GOOD!! For all the lofty, noble thoughts we may have about it, we have sex because it feels good. Plain and simple. It's one of the best endorphin & serotonin releases designed by nature.

Whether you believe in a Creationist view of life or Evolutionary, sex was made to feel good so we'd reproduce. We'd keep going back to having sex for a better chance at making more of us. Hell, look at the Praying Mantis. Sex feels SOOOOO damn good to the male praying mantis, that he is willing to die during it with the female biting his head off during sex and eating him. (Hopefully after he's had his orgasm.) Yeah, if I was a male praying mantis I'd be joining the priesthood quicker than Dubya can complete a sentence. "What?!!! You mean, I only get to have sex one time. And when I do, she's going to bite my head off and eat me?!! Screw that! I'm going to be celibate! Maybe with six legs I can figure out how to masturbate."

Thankfully for humans, and myself in particular because I'm quite fond of my head, sex doesn't involve decapitation.

"It's refuted a lot of gender stereotypes ... that men only want sex for the physical pleasure and women want love," said University of Texas clinical psychology professor Cindy Meston, the study's co-author. "That's not what I came up with in my findings."

Forget thinking that men are from Mars and women from Venus, "the more we look, the more we find similarity," said Dr. Irwin Goldstein, director of sexual medicine at Alvarado Hospital in San Diego. Goldstein, who wasn't part of Meston's study, said the Texas research made a lot of sense and adds to growing evidence that the vaunted differences in the genders may only be among people with sexual problems.

Again, DUH!!! Sex feels good for both men and women?! That's because both men and women have a vested interested in feeling good. I mean, I'm sure that if sex didn't feel good some of us would find some higher calling or greater good to have it thus ensuring the species' survival. (Said in my deepest man voice.) "Sorry guys, I can't go bowling tonight. I have to fulfill my civic duty tonight and have sex with my wife. Yes, I know it's a hardship. But I do it willingly for the good of our people!"

(Come to think of it, the ancient Jews had whole sections of rules and laws about how often a man needed to perform his husbandly duty depending on what kind of job he had. My fiancee's Jewish. I think I need to go reread those laws!)

So before I continue blambling any further, I'll close with what I'd say in a movie theater had this article been a movie preview. "You know, with the money they spent on this, we could have had a cure for cancer by now!!"